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Relationship Solutions
E-Newsletter
Message from the
Director
Hello and welcome to
our summer edition of Relationship
Solutions! I am very excited to be sending
out this newsletter and we have a few
announcements to make. First, I want to take
the time to welcome Ami Bhalodkar-Haque as
our newest edition to CCMFT. Ami had been
working with CCMFT as a graduate MFT intern
from September 2008 and completed her
training. She is now employed with us as of
June and I am very excited to have her
continue.
Some of you may have noticed in the last
newsletter that we recently opened a new
office. I want to officially announce the
grand opening of our fourth location (third
on Long Island) in Albertson/Roslyn. We
anxiously opened the doors on July 1st, 2009
and officially open for business. We will be
providing our therapeutic services (Couples,
Family, & Individual), our Anger Management
and Pre-Marital Programs, along with some
new ones including Bringing Baby Home and
PREP. I will be adding additional
information to our website with more details
about each of these new programs.
Our new office is located at One Potato Two
Tomato® and you can check out the
website. We will be working
collaboratively, with Laura Lynn and her
staff to integrate family, parent, tween and
teen services. We are very much looking
forward to this new relationship and will be
holding an “Open House Night” on Monday,
August 17th from 7pm-8:30pm. We welcome all
of our readers to come join us and meet the
Albertson staff and those at One Potato Two
Tomato®.
This month’s edition, sadly to say, will be
Andrea’s last monthly article. Andrea has
been writing our feature articles since
October 2007 and we certainly enjoyed them.
Andrea will continue to be a very important
part of CCMFT and actively working with
clients in our Rockville Centre office. We
will continue to provide an article each
month to our readers as we always have.
It is quite appropriate that this month’s
featured article focuses on loss and the
grieving process. If you have any questions
or need support around this topic,
contact us and speak with one of our
therapists.
Until next time, have a joyous summer!
Warmly,
Cari Sans
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Featured Article
Part of life?
You may recall that in our last newsletter,
we talked about the effects of divorce on
children. It seems as though with today’s
topic, we may have a variation on that same
theme—that of endings.
Unfortunately or fortunately depending on
your outlook, death is one of the universal
occurrences that each of us as human beings
will experience at various points in our
lives. Some experience death at a young age
while others are educated in these lessons
later in life. No matter what age you are, a
death in the family is traumatic and often
times folks are at a loss as to what to do
with all of the emotions that emit from the
occurrence.
Experts have said that there are several
emotional stages to the grief process, but I
like to think that they don’t always happen
in any particular order. It has been my
experience that the grieving process is like
a rollercoaster—very simply some days you
are up and some days you are down. Emotions
can include but are not limited to shock,
numbness, confusion, guilt, preoccupation,
despair, fatigue and loneliness. Sometimes
folks may even spiral down and exhibit some
depressive traits as well.
How does one cope with the loss of a loved
one? First let’s consider family belief
systems as they almost always come in to
play as a vehicle of coping. Some families
instill a religious explanation while others
may be more spiritual in their approach. Yet
others take a more pragmatic rationalization
and exclude any of the above-mentioned
reasons.
And as with most occurrences in life, we are
influenced by the themes and patterns in our
families of origin. For instance, some
families do not discuss feelings and tend to
“bury” them while others are more talkative
and tend to share with one another freely.
Think about your family for a moment. What
do they do in times of crisis? How do you
think this might influence you if you lost a
loved one? Or, if you have experienced a
death in the family, how has your family of
origin themes influenced you?
Often times rituals come in to play when a
loved one dies and this can also be a way of
coping. For instance, if you are of a
Catholic background, you may have a wake and
a funeral mass followed by a graveside
service and burial. Another example of
ritual may be one form of the Buddhist
custom of hosting the deceased at home for
several days while callers gather to pray
and celebrate the life of the departed. This
is often followed by cremation as there is a
belief that the soul of the deceased is set
free from bondage.
Although there are many different variations
on the rituals mentioned above, there is one
commonality: Rituals can also serve as a
vehicle of support as they allow extended
family members and friends the time and
space to pay respect to the deceased and
their loved ones and grieve together. And
this may be key to the grieving process.
All in all, a death in the family can
forever have a multitude of effects on all
involved. It is my hope that this article
has scratched the surface of a topic that is
often difficult to discuss for some folks.
Best of luck in your journey.
Tips on what can you do after a death
of a loved one
• Go slow and treat yourself kindly--it
takes a lot of energy to grieve. Experts
advise eating well-balanced meals and
getting plenty of rest and exercise to
replenish the energy you are exerting. Also,
these experts advise not making any major
life decisions for the first few months as
judgment may be clouded at this time.
• Reach out to your support system. And when
people ask how you are doing, don’t just say
“fine” if that is not true for you. Let
someone know how you feel.
• Join a support group for bereaved
folks—talking with someone who is walking in
or has walked in your shoes may be helpful
as they can relate and “speak your
language.”
• Journal or scrapbook your experience.
Include recollections of dreams, thoughts,
poems, or letters to your loved one who
died.
• If your emotions are overwhelming and
interfering with your daily routine, you may
consider talking to a therapist. You are
welcome to give us a call and we will be
happy to help you and your family.
Comments or questions? Email us at info@couplesandfamilies.com.
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Upcoming Events
"Open House
Night" at our new location
9 Albertson
Ave., Ste #3
Albertson,
NY 11507
Monday,
August 17th 7pm-8:30pm
This
is an opportunity to meet the staff at CCMFT
and One Potato Two Tomato. Information
about services, brochures, tips and other
goodies will be provided.
Light snack
and refreshment will be provided.
____________________________________________________________________________________________
Reserve your spot now for our two group
programs!
Marriage Prep: A Toolbox for
Today’s Couples
Our new premarital program is a culmination
of years of experience in helping folks
prepare for and maintain healthy marriages.
This 10-session program gives you the
beginner’s tools that most likely no one
ever told you about—it is a toolbox of
topics that newlyweds commonly present in
couples treatment.
Here is your chance to get a head start and
likely avoid or greatly reduce many newlywed
arguments! With our program, you and your
partner can get off to a terrific start—and
the honeymoon may not ever end!
• Identify family of origin issues that
impact your relationship
• Assess your couple traits and how these
may affect your marriage
• Learn healthy ways to build relationships
with in-laws
• Gain tools to effectively deal with
popular topics in new marriages including
communication, sex and money
• Learn how to establish healthy boundaries
in your marriage
*It is important to note that while we do
not have a religious piece to the program,
the topic is one that can be included if the
client desires.
Let us help you and your partner begin your
journey of commitment on a healthy track.
Contact us today for information about fees
and meeting locations. If you are unable to
attend group sessions, or desire a more
personalized format, we can customize the
program to weekly sessions for you and your
partner.
Fees:
$600 10 week program
*Payment plans available.
$125 initial intake
session (each couple is required to
meet with the group facilitator prior to
starting the group for 45 minutes)
**Credit Card, Cash,
and Check
accepted at this time.
$125-$135 for individual
(one-on-one) sessions (45-minute sessions).
Payment collected at each individual
session.
Contact us today! (212)
537-9313 or (516) 665-7889 ext. 1
Reserve your spot today or to talk with
a therapist regarding our other services.
email:
info@couplesandfamilies.com
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10-Week Anger Management
Learn effective
tools for dealing with anger in your
relationships. Anger is an emotion that we
all experience when we feel vulnerable or
attacked. The group will teach you effective
ways for managing and expressing anger.
Anger is explored in the context of
relationships and tools for improving
relationships will be provided. The goals of
the 10-week program are:
• To increase awareness of anger expression
patterns
• To learn how our anger experience is
shaped by our development and what we can
learn from our family and environment
• To identify current and past situations
that fuel anger
• To identify responsibilities in the
current anger situation that resulted in
either a self or outside referral
• To develop specific ways to de-escalate
potentially violent situations
• To decrease verbal and physical
manifestations of anger, aggression, or
violence while increasing awareness and
acceptance of emotions
*Participants will receive a certificate of
completion.
(Individual sessions
available on Mondays-Saturdays Manhattan and
Rockville Centre Offices)
Contact us to register and reserve your
spot!
Fees:
Individual/one-to-one: $1250 ($1000 if
paid upfront) *This fee varies depending on
the therapist and can range.
Group: $600 10 week program
*Payment plans available.
$80 initial intake
session for group only (each participant is required to
meet with the group facilitator prior to
starting the group for 45 minutes)
**Credit Card, Cash,
and Check
accepted at this time.
$125-$135 for individual
(one-on-one) sessions (45-minute sessions).
Payment collected at each individual
session.
Contact us today! (212)
537-9313 or (516) 665-7889 ext. 1
Reserve your spot today or to talk with
a therapist regarding our other services.
email:
info@couplesandfamilies.com
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The
Relationship
Solutions
newsletter
is written
with
relationships
in mind.
Our staff,
trained in
marriage and
family
therapy, are
dedicated to
helping
individuals,
couples and
families
improve
their
relationships.
Every month
you will
find
effective
tools for
building the
kind of
relationship
that works,
and feel
confident
about how to
make the
changes you
need. If you
are
struggling
with a
relationship,
maybe with
your spouse,
spouse-to-be,
your parent,
sibling or
your
children,
then contact
Counseling
Corner for
Marriage and
Family
Therapy,
P.C., and
find out how
we can help.
Get help
with
resolving
relationship
problems and
feel
empowered to
resolve
future
issues!
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Disclaimer:
Relationship Solutions was
created to provide useful
tidbits, to trigger thoughts
and provide resources. It is
not intended in any way to
be therapeutic. If you
believe you require further
assistance than is provided
here, please contact a
trained psychotherapist.
Contact Us for further
assistance and resources.
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