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Relationship Solutions
E-Newsletter
Table of Content
I.
Message from the Director
II.
Featured Article
IV.
Upcoming Event
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Message from the
Director
Welcome to our March
edition to Relationship Solutions! How are
all of you adjusting to this time change? I
must say it has been a challenge for me. It
actually has taken most of the week to feel
grounded again and not grasping for that
lost hour. On the upside, it is great to
have that longer daylight in the evening
leaving more time to enjoy the outdoors.
Well, I am finally settled and excited about
spring. My wheels are turning and I can’t
stop thinking of all the things I want to
implement into my practice and my personal
life.
Spring is a new
beginning and with this in mind, we can all
think of things that we want to change in
our lives. For me, I want to add more
creativity and balance to my life, so for
starters I have begun to take a yoga class
once a week. It is nice because it is not
too much of my time but it is helping me
slowly work into the practice. Since going,
it has brought me more balance and clarity.
This change is resonating in all different
aspects of my life and most importantly my
relationships. Whether I am working with a
client, my staff of therapists or my loved
ones, I am much more grounded and able to
respond thoughtfully. What kind of changes
would you like to create for yourself?
This month’s featured
topic is all about creating new beginnings,
the challenges to making changes and the
impact on others, as well as tips on taking
steps toward change. We hope you enjoy and
wish you a little spring in your jump
towards creating new beginnings!
Warmly,
Cari Sans
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Featured Article
New Beginnings
As we continue through
the month of March, a myriad of thoughts
come to mind. First is the fact that Spring
is just around the corner, and that with
every day of less than desirable weather we
take a step closer to sticking our tootsies
in the warm Summer sand.
In fact, the Spring (or
Vernal) Equinox typically takes place each
year in mid-March. This Equinox is one of
two points in the year when daytime and
nighttime hours are equal. One theme often
associated with the Spring Equinox is
conception and pregnancy. One example is
that the Pagan goddess of dawn, fertility
and new beginnings, Eostre, is believed to
be associated with this time of year.
Since Spring is
traditionally a time of renewal, the
opportunity to start anew is present yet
again. I think that as humans, we are
constantly being presented with chances to
revise multiple aspects of our lives—that we
have the ability to make change is one of
our greatest attributes. With the dawn of
every new day we are given the chance to
start a fresh tradition, or the opportunity
to better care for ourselves in some way.
However, change can be
a double-edged sword, particularly when it
affects other members of the family system.
Many times change causes a multitude of
feelings from other members, such as shock,
disbelief, or frustration. So often when
families or a system presents for treatment,
they have been moving along in a particular
way, with everyone playing out his or her
part in the production. Sometimes this
production is unhealthy, and might lead to
one member questioning the status quo or
acting out of turn in some way. Hopefully
at this point, they would seek help and
enter treatment.
The idea that a system
might be functioning in an unhealthy way is
many times a “shock to the system,” (to
borrow a phrase). It may even be insulting
to some folks. After all, the family has
been operating this way for many years and
nobody’s had a problem so far! Now that
so-and-so is acting out, that person must
have the problem. This is the thinking that
often leads to what is called “identifying
the patient.
The challenge then
becomes working together to help the
remaining members recognize their roles in
the unhealthy system and to make changes to
better that. This is a daunting task, as
many times folks are comfortable in their
roles. Moreover, we humans generally are
creatures of habit and have a particular
“comfort zone” that we are familiar with.
Change can be scary.
All in all, it may not
be easy to begin a change, but it may be
necessary for your own growth and emotional
development. Hopefully, others will follow
your lead and you may all be in a healthier
place at some point in the future.
So, what about your
spring awakening? Is there something that
you have been wanting to put in to practice,
a new routine that you’d like to try out?
Perhaps you’d simply like to better care for
your relationship. Whatever you choose,
best of luck and enjoy your new beginning!
And of course, let us know if we can help
you in your journey. Be well!
Tips to remember as
you make change…
- Be specific
about your goals. For example, “I want
to be more physically healthy” is a
little broad. Try something like, “I
want to attend the Butt & Gut class at
my gym 3 times per week.”
- Make a change
that YOU want to make—making change at
someone else’s request may result in a
temporary arrangement, an insincere
attempt, or resentment toward the
requestor.
- Go slow and be
patient with yourself as you move toward
your new lifestyle—remember that you
have to crawl before you can walk.
- Try to be
sensitive with others as you work toward
your change—they may have a difficult
time adjusting to the “new you.” Talk
with them about it—opening a dialogue
will help them feel validated.
- Ask for help.
Sometimes we are conditioned with old
habits and it can be difficult to go it
alone. Reach out to someone who will
support you—your partner perhaps. Or,
you can always call us.
Comments or
suggestions? Email
andrea@couplesandfamilies.com.
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Upcoming Event
10-Week Anger Group in the
Manhattan Office Starting Soon!
We are close to starting our next Anger
Management program in the Manhattan office.
We are hoping for a few more individuals to
reserve a spot and hope to start soon. If you are interested in this
group, please contact our Intake Coordinator
at (212) 537-9313 ext. 1 to reserve a spot
today.
Learn effective
tools for dealing with anger in your
relationships. Anger is an emotion that we
all experience when we feel vulnerable or
attacked. The group will teach you effective
ways for managing and expressing anger.
Anger is explored in the context of
relationships and tools for improving
relationships will be provided. The goals of
the 10-week program are:
• To increase awareness of anger expression
patterns
• To learn how our anger experience is
shaped by our development and what we can
learn from our family and environment
• To identify current and past situations
that fuel anger
• To identify responsibilities in the
current anger situation that resulted in
either a self or outside referral
• To develop specific ways to de-escalate
potentially violent situations
• To decrease verbal and physical
manifestations of anger, aggression, or
violence while increasing awareness and
acceptance of emotions
*Participants will receive a certificate of
completion.
Reserve your spot for one of our groups now!
A new group starting
soon--register today!
Saturdays 11:00am-12:30pm;
Manhattan Office
(Individual sessions
available on Mondays-Saturdays Manhattan and
Rockville Centre Offices)
Contact us to register and reserve your
spot!
Fees:
$60 per group session (each 10 week
session)
$80 initial intake
session (each participant is required to
meet with the group facilitator prior to
starting the group for 45 minutes)
How payment is collected:
50% of group fee ($300) is collected at
the initial intake session along with the
initial intake fee ($80). The
remaining payment of $300 is collected at
the 5th group session. Cash or check
accepted at this time.
$125 for individual
(one-on-one) sessions (45-minute sessions).
Payment collected at each individual
session.
Contact us today! (212)
537-9313 ext. 1
Reserve your spot today for next 2008 Anger Management Group or to talk with
a therapist regarding our other services.
email:
cari@couplesandfamilies.com
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The
Relationship
Solutions
newsletter
is written
with
relationships
in mind.
Our staff,
trained in
marriage and
family
therapy, are
dedicated to
helping
individuals,
couples and
families
improve
their
relationships.
Every month
you will
find
effective
tools for
building the
kind of
relationship
that works,
and feel
confident
about how to
make the
changes you
need. If you
are
struggling
with a
relationship,
maybe with
your spouse,
spouse-to-be,
your parent,
sibling or
your
children,
then contact
Counseling
Corner for
Marriage and
Family
Therapy,
P.C., and
find out how
we can help.
Get help
with
resolving
relationship
problems and
feel
empowered to
resolve
future
issues!
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Disclaimer:
Relationship Solutions was
created to provide useful
tidbits, to trigger thoughts
and provide resources. It is
not intended in any way to
be therapeutic. If you
believe you require further
assistance than is provided
here, please contact a
trained psychotherapist.
Contact Us for further
assistance and resources.
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